I've struggled with the p-word for my entire life. There have been things/events/relationships/challenges I've avoided due to the p-word. It has haunted me and been the catalyst for quite a few moments of regret. What is this dangerous p-word?
So many times I've given up on things simply because I could not do them perfectly. It's silly and illogical, but it is a very real challenge for me. Last night, after I discovered I hadn't actually completed the slice of life challenge because I had accidentally missed one post, I honestly considered just giving up and not making the final March 31 post. I even considered skipping the celebration this afternoon.
It's absurd, right? To feel as though the past month doesn't matter because it is short a few hundred words? I would never allow one of my students to declare something so ridiculous, so why should it be ok for me to do so? It isn't ok to give up. What is ok is to not be perfect. It's perfectly fine to be imperfect.
The older I get, the less I have to fight this compulsion. Becoming a mother and then a teacher, as well as marrying a very laid-back man, has forced me to become more flexible and patient with my flaws. Things usually don't go exactly as planned, and this slice of life experience is an excellent example of that. There were issues with my HS students being co-authors, I missed a few midnight deadlines, I found topics of inspiration far more difficult to come by, and as it turns out, I actually forgot to make one post.
However, despite my imperfection, I still count this blog as a success. I accepted the challenge, I made time for it, and I did the best job I could do considering all of life's other responsibilities. This post, my 30th post, is a bonus post. It is late, as it should have been made 18 days ago, but it is valuable none the less. I will be making my 31st post this evening, after I've had a full day to reflect upon my full slice of life experience. In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy today. I'm going to celebrate the achievements of my peers and the brave students who shared so much of themselves over the last month. And that, is perfectly fine.